


Cherry

by eridol



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Cross-Posted on Wattpad, F/M, Love Triangles, Other, Song: Cherry (Harry Styles), Songfic, request, rip saeran
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:49:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25780879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eridol/pseuds/eridol
Summary: Maybe it wasn't so bad, living in his dreams instead of in reality. They were full of vague pictures and soft laughs, stains from your cherry lipstick on his mouth and your voice- instead of Saeyoung, you were calling him 'baby' with that sweet voice of yours.
Relationships: 707 | Choi Luciel/Choi Saeran/Reader, 707 | Choi Luciel/Main Character, 707 | Choi Luciel/Reader, Choi Saeran/Main Character, Choi Saeran/Reader
Kudos: 46





	Cherry

Saeran _knew_ it was wrong of him to be in love with you in the first place, and he _knew_ that he shouldn't have been dreaming about you in such a romantic manner when you were married to his twin brother, but he couldn't help the anger and disappointment that took him over when he woke up from yet _another_ dream about you.

Waking up might've been the worst part. 

The first few seconds weren't bad- no, they were always good. He still felt happy and refreshed after waking up from such a sweet dream, but then his senses returned to him and he realized where he was, that the dream wasn't real and that you were probably sleeping next to his brother as he laid in bed by himself. 

Maybe it wasn't so bad, living in his dreams instead of in reality. They were full of vague pictures and soft laughs, stains from your cherry lipstick on his mouth and your _voice_ \- instead of Saeyoung, you were calling _him_ 'baby' with that sweet voice of yours. 

_Don't you call him 'baby',  
_ _We're not talking lately,  
_ _Don't you call him what you used to call me,_

_I... I confess,  
_ _I can tell that you are at your best,  
_ _I'm selfish so I'm hating it,_

It was wrong for him to want you. You were Saeyoung's, and even if something happened between the two of you, Saeran wouldn't dare to cross that boundary and betray his brother like that. It just wasn't right- after all, it had been you and Saeyoung who had rescued him from Mint Eye, helped him receive therapy and medications, get his health back on track, and took him into your shared home. You and Saeyoung had already been together when Saeran met you, so logically, he shouldn't have allowed those feelings to take him, but he couldn't help it. His feelings weren't something he'd ever had control over. 

So, he accepted it, and he lived. He tried not to think about it most of the time to no avail, _tried_ to enjoy his life. At one point, he'd even thought about moving out to get away from you and travel for a bit, but Saeyoung had quickly shot the idea down, and he'd listened and stayed despite his own issues.

You were happy and that was all that mattered. Saeyoung treated you well, adored you, _loved_ you, and gave you far more than Saeran ever could have, so maybe it was for the best... At least he never spoke on his feelings, and no one ever seemed to pick up on them. 

Still, though, the more you and Saeyoung fell for each other, the more it felt like you and Saeran fell apart... The two of you hardly talked like you used to since the wedding. It had always been platonic, sure, but the redhead had always cherished the late-night conversations on the roof, the days when you'd hold him because he was breaking down, the mornings you'd make him breakfast- it was all in the past now. 

_I noticed that,  
_ _There's a piece of you in how I dress,  
_ _Take it as a compliment,_

It was too hot underneath his covers because of the pajama pants he was wearing, a fluffy and (f/c) pair that you'd bought him for Christmas the year before. They reminded him of you, so he wore them most nights, even during the summer when it was far too hot for them.

_Don't you call him 'baby',  
_ _We're not talking lately,  
_ _Don't you call him what you used to call me,_

And maybe you'd never been _his_ , but he'd always been _yours_ , and he missed what the two of you used to have, even if it was never romantic- even more, he missed the version of you that was in his dreams, and it made him wish that he could just be in love with the _idea_ of you instead of the version of you that he saw every day, but he couldn't lie to himself like that. He was in love with you and always had been. He didn't just love the version of you in his dreams- he loved the you he saw every morning with messy hair and coffee breath, the you that cried a little too easily and got overemotional because of ridiculously minuscule things, the you that was bold and persistent to the point where it was often annoying... The you who loved Saeyoung. Saeran loved every version of you. 

_I... I just miss,  
I just miss your accent and your friends,  
Did you know I still talk to them?_   
  
_Does he take you walking 'round his parents' gallery?  
_   
_Don't you call him 'baby'  
We're not talking lately  
Don't you call him what you used to call me  
_   
_Don't you call him 'baby',_

_We're not talking lately,_

_Don't you call him what you used to call me,_

He had woken up from another dream, that of which he wanted to return to, but when he laid back down, a knock on his door had him jumping up, any hope of going back to sleep any time in the next few minutes relinquished when you opened his door. Though you'd seen him in some pretty bad states before, he still felt embarrassed when you saw him before he had made himself look presentable, so he found himself praying that you would leave just as fast as you had come.

"Hi!" You opened the door all the way and leaned against the doorway so you could take a look at him with your soft (e/c) eyes. "Are you sleeping?" Upon realizing that _yes_ , he _had_ been sleeping and was about to go back to sleep, you gave him an apologetic glance and placed a hand on the back of your neck. "Oh, I'm sorry..."

"What do you want?" He asked in a tone laced with feigned irritation. 

"Well, no... No, it doesn't matter-"

"Are you going to the beach?" Saeran questioned and looked you up and down. You were in sandals and a (f/c) swimsuit that brought out the glow of your (s/c) skin, a lot of which was left bare. A bit embarrassed and able to feel his pale cheeks burn red, Saeran glanced off to the side to avoid your gaze. "You've been there with my brother, haven't you? I think I remember him talking about it..."

"Yes, we've been to the beach, and now we-" In the middle of your sentence, Saeyoung called out to you from the other room to let you know that he had the beach bag ready, so you responded. "Perfect!" You then turned back to Saeran, (s/c) cheeks dusted a bright pink. "Saeran, you wanna head with?"

He debated on it for a moment. Usually, you and Saeyoung got upset when Saeran didn't join the two of you for outings- you feared that he was becoming anti-social again, which he was, and that made you try even harder than before to get him out of his room and out of the house, so he usually just went along with whatever you wanted to avoid causing stress, but... He felt like shit, and he thought there might've been a good chance of him snapping if he had to spend an entire day fading into the background and watching you and Saeyoung act as gushy towards each other as the two of you usually did. It was painful. 

"No, I'm fine, thank you."

"Aw, c'mon!" You pouted. 

"I'm not feeling well," He lied- or, maybe it wasn't _technically_ a lie- he felt like shit, but he knew that you were going to think he was sick when, in reality, he was just going through emotional turmoil. "Really, I shouldn't go, but you two have fun."

You opened the door and moved like you were about to walk into the room, but Saeran gave you a dismissive wave. You always understood what he meant even when he didn't speak, so you took the hint and remained in the doorway for a moment. There was a certain level of concern on your face, that of which you quickly tried to hide with a bright smile- the smile he'd fallen in love with so many years ago. 

"Oh, okay, but let me know if you need anything! We'll probably be out for a few hours. Stay hydrated and take care of yourself. You know where the medicine is, and I got you a bag of those cherries you like, so they're in the fridge! We'll bring you back lunch, too."

"Oh, okay... Thank you."

He nodded, and then, you gave him another smile before exiting and shutting the door behind you. Saeran sat up with a sigh and ran a hand through his hair. He figured he'd wait for you and Saeyoung to leave before doing anything, so he simply sat there, listening to all of the sounds in the house.

Saeyoung's footsteps, surprisingly quiet despite his loud personality and overbearing presence, though that was probably due to his physical training from when he'd worked for the agency. Your footsteps joined his, a little louder due to the sandals on your feet and how the plastic sounded when it hit the (mostly) wooden floors. 

A few minutes passed. You and Saeyoung's happy voices echoed through the house, _'good morning'_ s, _'I love you'_ s, and casual conversations lingering and passing through the walls for him to hear. Unable to bring himself not to, Saeran continued to listen despite how his heart sank with every word he heard. He felt his eye twitch at the _'you look so sexy in that, baby,'_ followed by your little giggle. Thankfully, though, after a while of sitting there stewing in his own jealousy, he heard the front door open and close. The house went quiet. The obnoxiously loud sound of the sports car that his brother drove being pulled out of the parking lot roared in his ears for a moment, and then there was silence again.

The two of you had left. He was alone, which had him both relieved and unsettled. He didn't like being alone. He missed _you_. He even missed _Saeyoung_. But he didn't miss you _and_ Saeyoung together. 

Saeran stood up from his bed and slowly trudged out of the room. Normally, he wouldn't walk around in the pajama pants and no shirt that he wore to bed since he was self-conscious about his body, but neither you nor Saeyoung were there to see him, so he didn't bother covering the arms that were littered with scars or the chest and stomach that he felt were too skinny. Now that he was alone, he felt like he could relax just a little bit and drown himself in his own thoughts. Maybe that wasn't healthy, but he'd never been healthy anyways, so he couldn't bring himself to care about that too much.

When he padded through the living room and into the kitchen, he was surrounded by pictures on the wall that made his head hurt; pictures of you and Saeyoung when you first met, when you were dating, during your engagement, your wedding. Saeran was in a few of them, mostly on the side or in the background since he tried to avoid cameras. The few photos he was knowingly in, you and Saeyoung had dragged him into, and his face always screamed annoyance in those while you and Saeyoung looked as happy as ever. 

Typical.

He tried his best to ignore the frames on the walls and made his way to the fridge, which he opened and peered into. Just as you'd said, the bag of red cherries was sitting on the shelf right in front of him, practically waiting to be eaten.

He didn't like real, fresh cherries. They were always much more bitter than the maraschino ones that were on ice cream and milkshakes, but he'd eaten them with you when the two of you had first met, so he connected them to you and the memory- the memory of a simpler, happier time for him. So, even though the taste was sour and bitter, he grabbed two of the de-pitted, de-stemmed fruits and popped them into his mouth. The unpleasant yet familiarly comforting taste had him smiling softly as he closed the fridge and returned to his room.

You and Saeyoung would be gone for a while- it was an hour drive to the beach nearby, and then another hour to drive back combined with the hour or two you and Saeyoung would spend there. Part of him hated that you were gone, but the other part of him was glad to finally get a break. An odd feeling of peace bled into the anxiety that consumed him regarding his feelings for you, and it was comparable to trying to mix oil and water, but he didn't question it, only shutting the door behind him and falling back onto his bed.

His heart hurt. His eyes burned from crying and sleeping too much. He was tired and depressed. He didn't know what to do.

A whiff of your perfume filled his nostrils and he sighed, knowing it was only there because he had taken the bottle you kept in you and Saeyoung's shared bedroom and sprayed it onto his own pillows once or twice. It was a sad, pathetic secret that he planned on taking with him to his grave, but... As he laid there, he couldn't help but turn to the side and take that perfume-coated pillow into his arms. 

With that, he closed his eyes, ready to fall back into another cherry-hued dream- a dream where, instead of Saeyoung, _he_ would be the one who you called 'baby'. 


End file.
